The Emotional Minefield...

Tread carefully... Have you ever been in a conversation and felt it was heading somewhere? Have you ever wanted it to head somewhere else?

I remember spending a week with this feeling hanging over me, that something would happen later in the week, and that that "something" was going to be bad. So I did what I could to keep from bringing that "something" down on myself. I could feel a sort of tension in the air, like a coiled spring waiting to unleash, or to be more accurate, like a fully charged thundercloud about to let loose the first lightning bolt. I knew I was walking in an emotional minefield, and I wanted to get out...

Have you ever seen a person just "blow up?" Suddenly, that little thing that you said turns into a shouting match. Be it a discussion of politics at the office, or the mention of a past hurt among family members, or something totally unpredictable, you find yourself at the center of a massive explosion of emotion. It's the emotional minefield...

Minefields do not simply "happen." They are created when the army on one side of a war wants to deny the other army access to roads, to buildings, even to land itself. The most vicious mines aren't targeted at soldiers, they're called "antipersonnel mines" because they're targeted at people in general. Mines have killed or wounded thousands of innocent people. The worst part of minefields is that usually they are concealed, and you never know you're in one until the first mine goes off.

Every one of us has "triggers," as psychologists call them. They're the things that get under our skin, the things that are hot-buttons for debate, the things that we cannot shut up and tolerate! We should realize them, but sometimes they just "pop up" like an annoying window in the middle of our screens. Almost instinctively, we respond, and we say things that we often look back on with deep regret.

This minefield is nothing new, in fact it's been around since before land mines even existed (James 3)! Blow for blow, the author describes the tongue of humans, and how difficult it is to tame: "Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be." (James 3:10)

I wish I could say I have the answer, but most of the time, I do not. In fact, there are times when even I stumble on somebody else's minefield and... BOOM! There are times when I let people walk into my minefield as well. Unknowingly, they step somewhere that they shouldn't and... KABLOOIE!

The Bible gives us a good suggestion: perhaps we ought to learn to "sow in peace" (James 3:18) instead of laying mines. Perhaps, if we could sow enough seeds of peace, strengthen enough friendships, we could protect each other from the evil that lies buried in ourselves. If we follow this truth, perhaps we might one day unbury that evil and defuse it.

For more information about physical minefields, see the Wikipedia article on land mines.